If I look at the mass, I will never help. If I look at the one, I will. - Mother
Teresa
Bob and I attended a foster parent orientation last night. Some
days we have no idea which direction this journey is headed, and so we explore
the areas we feel called to help. The need is so great, it's hard to know some
times where to put our energy, and still care for our family unit
now.
When we started this journey a year and a half ago, we really
thought we were going one way: an international adoption from Uganda. We
thought we knew how it would go, had an idea of a time frame, and pictured our
ideal family when it got to that point.
We've since learned that we have
no idea how this will look. And we are ok with that.
Our destination
only involves stepping out in faith and being available. The rest, is up to
God.
The outpouring of support of our friends, and strangers to raise
money has been humbling. And keeps us moving forward and clinging to the idea
that a domestic adoption could financially happen for us. Without that help, we
won't get there, which could lead us to other ways of caring for those less
fortunate, and that's ok too.
The idea of being a home, readily available
for children in our community on a temporary or permanent basis also intrigues
us.
Our heart is for family, our own biological kids, adopted ones, or
simply those that need to be loved on by our family for a short period of time.
We trust that God has the perfect picture of our family, and are encouraged by
how he's revealing it to us, in His perfect time.
The Hansel Family
Saturday, December 7, 2013
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
keeping our eyes above the waves...
You call me out upon the water
The great unknown, where my feet may fail
And there I find you in the mystery
In oceans deep, my faith will stand
The opening verses of the song "Ocean" by Hillsong United played this morning as I was driving into work. So many people, when they see us, ask how the adoption is going. Most of my answers consist of shallow responses. The typical: paperwork, home study, fund raising responses.
What I should say is...
I thought I knew how to swim. I thought I knew what faith was.
He has called us to something that is bigger than us. And it's taking a long time. In my book. Most days I feel like we are out in the middle of the ocean, we've left sight of the shore, the next step in our adoption process could be just over the horizon, but it could also be an illlusion once we paddle over. There could be another storm tomorrow, we could have a few days of calm, we may be unaware that sharks are swimming underneath, some days we see their fins.
But we trust him.
And we keep swimming. And we're getting stronger.
Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed, and You won't start now
The great unknown, where my feet may fail
And there I find you in the mystery
In oceans deep, my faith will stand
The opening verses of the song "Ocean" by Hillsong United played this morning as I was driving into work. So many people, when they see us, ask how the adoption is going. Most of my answers consist of shallow responses. The typical: paperwork, home study, fund raising responses.
What I should say is...
I thought I knew how to swim. I thought I knew what faith was.
He has called us to something that is bigger than us. And it's taking a long time. In my book. Most days I feel like we are out in the middle of the ocean, we've left sight of the shore, the next step in our adoption process could be just over the horizon, but it could also be an illlusion once we paddle over. There could be another storm tomorrow, we could have a few days of calm, we may be unaware that sharks are swimming underneath, some days we see their fins.
But we trust him.
And we keep swimming. And we're getting stronger.
Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed, and You won't start now
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Did you know they were adopted?
Steve Jobs.
Faith Hill.
Marilyn Monroe.
Babe Ruth.
Sarah McLachlan.
Dede Griesbauer.
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
We still need your help!
This process is long and... Worth it.
We still need your help! We are no one special, just a simple family, knowing we have love to give another family member.
Our next step is working our way through the fee schedule for the adoption of our little guy.
You can make a donation though PayPal, our account is: erinmhansel@hotmail.com
Do you have a fundraising idea? Email me, erinmhansel@hotmail.com
Read more about our journey through this blog!
Most importantly, thank you for sharing our story. The more people we reach, the more likely we are to fill this spot in our heart!
Thank you!
Bob, Erin, Jett, Maggie, and Faye
We still need your help! We are no one special, just a simple family, knowing we have love to give another family member.
Our next step is working our way through the fee schedule for the adoption of our little guy.
You can make a donation though PayPal, our account is: erinmhansel@hotmail.com
Do you have a fundraising idea? Email me, erinmhansel@hotmail.com
Read more about our journey through this blog!
Most importantly, thank you for sharing our story. The more people we reach, the more likely we are to fill this spot in our heart!
Thank you!
Bob, Erin, Jett, Maggie, and Faye
Thursday, September 12, 2013
the last bits... of our home study.
This has been a week of the "lasts" of our home study completion. On Monday, we visited with the social worker, to show her our new house and fill her in on our summer. And what a summer it's been. When we put things on hold, we didn't know what the future would hold. We knew we needed to give some undivided attention to our marriage, our family, and some other circumstances that were beyond our control. We wonder if the attention needed would have come about without having been in this process, we're thankful for the tough times, and for the new mercies each morning. To have a home study done on your family is to be an open book, vulnerability is not my strong suite. To open up about the hard, ugly parts, and to be judged for them, with no control over what is written about your family, is breath taking. But necessary. We have nothing to hide, we are who we are, we are a complete work in progress, with moments of hard, moments of joy, moments of triumph, and moments of defeat. And we wouldn't change a moment of it. When this little guy joins our family, the little guy that our three dream about about daily, talk about, and ask many questions about (his size, the color of his skin, his name, when we'll get him), we'll be ready. We know its in His perfect time, and not our own.
This Saturday we have our final training, and then it's written, the home study will be complete and submitted to the placement agency. And then we do some more waiting. I've never, ever been a patient person, ever. Ever. And this process is shaping my whole being. Again, no doubt He brought us here to make us who He wanted us to be. There's no stones unturned when we submitted to His will for our lives, there's no part He hasn't touched. He is giving us a life full of joy and victory, far beyond what we deserve or ever imagined, in the form of our children, the restoration of our marriage (that we know will always be a work in progress), the care of our health, finances, safety, and beyond. And even if it was all stripped away, which in times of our life it felt like it had been, we trust Him. What is written about us, is in His hands, our little guy, is in His hands, our three, are in His hands, and our marriage, is in His hands.
This Saturday we have our final training, and then it's written, the home study will be complete and submitted to the placement agency. And then we do some more waiting. I've never, ever been a patient person, ever. Ever. And this process is shaping my whole being. Again, no doubt He brought us here to make us who He wanted us to be. There's no stones unturned when we submitted to His will for our lives, there's no part He hasn't touched. He is giving us a life full of joy and victory, far beyond what we deserve or ever imagined, in the form of our children, the restoration of our marriage (that we know will always be a work in progress), the care of our health, finances, safety, and beyond. And even if it was all stripped away, which in times of our life it felt like it had been, we trust Him. What is written about us, is in His hands, our little guy, is in His hands, our three, are in His hands, and our marriage, is in His hands.
Sunday, August 11, 2013
where we started.
And I don't think it's come to an end. Our hearts were drawn to Uganda, for a reason. And while it doesn't make sense at times, this long curvy road, I don't doubt God will use it.
Our friends, who are in need of prayer in their adoption and for the health of their little girls they haven't yet brought home, brought these back from Uganda when they went to meet their daughters. It's amazing to have support of people, who while in the thick of it themselves, think of you also.
The handmade purses are a suggested donation of $40 and the paper bead bracelets and necklaces (too many to picture) are $20. These would make great gifts, supporting our adoption, especially as we come to a completion of our home study, the time line of when we add to our family is dependent on the money. And we trust him fully that it will come.
If you're out of state, I'm happy to mail them to you for free.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
we're still here.
And we're still moving. Moving toward what God planned and nothing we could have ever dreamed up. Some days it feels like it's a snail's pace, some days we feel like we're making real progress. But we trust that it is his timing, and not ours.
This weekend is our volunteer team at the Boulder 70.3 triathlon. Ironman gives grants to groups who work their races and we are super excited to be well staffed and ready to go on Sunday to receive it! It's a big step forward financially, which is what we need.
These next few months are going to need to be filled with financially fulfilling fundraisers. With our home study nearly done (it's shy of 4 documents that should be in the mail and 1 training session in September), we are about to encounter big numbers in our fee schedule for our placement agency. The sooner these numbers are met, the sooner we are able to bring that little guy into our family. AND WE NEED YOUR IDEAS! How do we reach this goal? What have you seen done in the past, that works? We'll do what it takes to get there, this is our child, and we'll get him home with your help.
Your prayers are appreciated this week, as always, as we have a big decision to make. We're certain God will direct the path we go down and know that's he's got this, not in anyway I had ever imagined, but in his good, and perfect plan.
We're still here. And we're really glad you are too.
This weekend is our volunteer team at the Boulder 70.3 triathlon. Ironman gives grants to groups who work their races and we are super excited to be well staffed and ready to go on Sunday to receive it! It's a big step forward financially, which is what we need.
These next few months are going to need to be filled with financially fulfilling fundraisers. With our home study nearly done (it's shy of 4 documents that should be in the mail and 1 training session in September), we are about to encounter big numbers in our fee schedule for our placement agency. The sooner these numbers are met, the sooner we are able to bring that little guy into our family. AND WE NEED YOUR IDEAS! How do we reach this goal? What have you seen done in the past, that works? We'll do what it takes to get there, this is our child, and we'll get him home with your help.
Your prayers are appreciated this week, as always, as we have a big decision to make. We're certain God will direct the path we go down and know that's he's got this, not in anyway I had ever imagined, but in his good, and perfect plan.
We're still here. And we're really glad you are too.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
our own backyard
I've written this post many times, unsure of how to say it or express our hearts best. We've come to this decision after much discussion and prayer. As I sat with a friend by the pool this week, tears streaming down my face, explaining why I feel like a failure and how unsure I was of what people must think of our family. She reminded me this journey is tough, and there's no way you get to your destination without traveling ALL of it. This story, chronicaled for him to one day to read, and thus broadcast for others, will hopefully one day express to him the love we had for him, before we even knew him, and the journey we took to get to him.
I get something in my head and forge ahead, with great speed and constant vigilance until I accomplish it. I don't give up, I don't quit, and I train harder, some times to a fault. I read, I gain knowledge, and I figure out the best way. God's put up with my way of learning for many, many years. When I told my sister, she wasn't the slightest bit surprised. There's a quote that says something like this:
"Someone once asked me, "why do you always insist on taking the hard road?" I replied, "why do you assume I see two roads."
The roads we've attempted to go down, believing our path was Uganda, was a "no" in 3 solid directions. The stress it was putting our family under was taking its toll. And after many conversations together, we decided to pursue a domestic adoption. The weight has been lifted and the excitement is back, and our 3 love the idea, as their hearts are ready and willing to love this little one as well. Faye and I were walking yesterday and saw a woman holding a baby, in her long drawn out sentence, which seemed more of a conversation with herself, she said,"isn't that baby cute? I wish we could get a baby. Oh wait, we are! That's so great."
I regret nothing of this road, the things we've learned, and the doors that have been closed. We've learned a great deal about adoption, strengthened our relationship, and have grown closer to God through it all. This journey may now take a bit longer, but I know it will bring us to our little guy that will grow our family the way God has intended. And I am so grateful for His patience with my learning curve.
Sunday, June 9, 2013
one at a time (or two)
A friend is headed to the airport tonight, she and her family will be heading to Africa via the red eye. Her quiet journey to listen to Gods call for their lives is inspiring.
Sitting in the kitchen tonight with Bob, I told him about their flights and who they'd meet and what they'd do while they were there. We shared the same thoughts, "won't it be surreal heading to the airport with the same intention?" But even louder in our heads was, "will we ever get there?" Most days the task at hand: 3 kids, jobs, finances, adoption, etc, cloud our journey. The paper that needs 4 signatures and a phot ID attached to it sits on the table for days, because we rush past it and who can find a stamp? But we get to it, get our blood drawn, apply for passports, and update this legal document, and that one, and buy stamps. One day at a time, with one foot in front of the other, we'll get on the red eye too.
Saturday, May 25, 2013
it would be easier NOT to adopt
When we started this journey a year ago, we stayed quiet. We told only a select few. We told people we knew would support us, pray for us, and encourage us. We knew that telling the rest of our community would bring support, but also questions. We did not realize that this calling would bring hurtful words from those closest to us, and from strangers, unimaginable financial challenges, a severe spiritual attack on our marriage, and everyday hiccups that we now know have been thrown at us because of our bigger calling. But we serve a great God. One that knows our needs before we ask. One that will provide a place for us to live so we can provide a family for this little guy, in His timing. Do we doubt? Yes. Do we cling to Him as He slowly reveals His plan? Absolutely. The lilies of the field trust Him, why wouldn't we?
Please pray for us as we dig our heels in and continue this journey. We are aware that we could say no, no to this little guy, and a lot of our worldly "problems" could go away. But we refuse to give up. He's got this, and our little guy, on the other side of the world, in the palm of His hand.
Matthew 6:25-27
New International Version
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
Please pray for us as we dig our heels in and continue this journey. We are aware that we could say no, no to this little guy, and a lot of our worldly "problems" could go away. But we refuse to give up. He's got this, and our little guy, on the other side of the world, in the palm of His hand.
Matthew 6:25-27
New International Version
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Summer Goals?
With our home study nearing an end, our fee schedule for this adoption is speeding up...
Exciting? Yes.
Closer to this little guy being a part of our family? Yes.
Having to completely trust that God has this and will provide? Big gulp. YES!
Training for a triathlon? Running your first 5k, 10k, or half marathon? Simply want the accountability that comes from a coach helping you stay in shape?
At $100/month I can help you reach your fitness goals. With a 6 month commitment of working together, it is $75/month.
What you get:
- customized daily workouts sent each week via email that help you reach your goals
- unlimited text, email, and phone support
Email me, erinmhansel@hotmail.com and lets get you started on achieving those goals!
Exciting? Yes.
Closer to this little guy being a part of our family? Yes.
Having to completely trust that God has this and will provide? Big gulp. YES!
Training for a triathlon? Running your first 5k, 10k, or half marathon? Simply want the accountability that comes from a coach helping you stay in shape?
At $100/month I can help you reach your fitness goals. With a 6 month commitment of working together, it is $75/month.
What you get:
- customized daily workouts sent each week via email that help you reach your goals
- unlimited text, email, and phone support
Email me, erinmhansel@hotmail.com and lets get you started on achieving those goals!
Sunday, May 12, 2013
An Arbonne Opportunity
A few years back, while I was a full time mom, I started selling Arbonne's amazing skincare products as a way to help supplement our growing families needs. While coaching soon became a full time job, I never stopped using their nutritional products.
Fast forward a few years, a few more kids, and now an international adoption on the horizon, we are again hoping that it will help us finance an international adoption to bring our little guy home.
As I stood in the kitchen this morning, a tired M in my arms, F wrapped around my leg, and J walking up the stairs, sleepy eyed but with the words "Happy Mother's Day" coming out of his mouth, I felt blessed. Their presence in my life overwhelms my heart each day. And with those thoughts, come the dreams of our little guy, who's story I don't know yet, but who I love already. This journey to get him weighs heavily on the financial side of things, so our brains our constantly getting creative in ways to raise the necessary funds.
Here's how you can help:
1. Host an Arbonne party with 5 friends that I haven't met. Let me come, tell our story, and present the health and wellness products that I love and use!
2. Browse Arbonne.com, let me know what you'd like to purchase. I can order it for you and have it at your door, with 35% of it going directly toward our adoption!
3. Become a consultant yourself and share these products with your friends and family, while having extra income yourself!
Lots of love to you Momma's out there today, I cherish the feelings we share, of doing anything for our children, the ones in our homes and the ones on the other side of the world!
Fast forward a few years, a few more kids, and now an international adoption on the horizon, we are again hoping that it will help us finance an international adoption to bring our little guy home.
As I stood in the kitchen this morning, a tired M in my arms, F wrapped around my leg, and J walking up the stairs, sleepy eyed but with the words "Happy Mother's Day" coming out of his mouth, I felt blessed. Their presence in my life overwhelms my heart each day. And with those thoughts, come the dreams of our little guy, who's story I don't know yet, but who I love already. This journey to get him weighs heavily on the financial side of things, so our brains our constantly getting creative in ways to raise the necessary funds.
Here's how you can help:
1. Host an Arbonne party with 5 friends that I haven't met. Let me come, tell our story, and present the health and wellness products that I love and use!
2. Browse Arbonne.com, let me know what you'd like to purchase. I can order it for you and have it at your door, with 35% of it going directly toward our adoption!
3. Become a consultant yourself and share these products with your friends and family, while having extra income yourself!
Lots of love to you Momma's out there today, I cherish the feelings we share, of doing anything for our children, the ones in our homes and the ones on the other side of the world!
Sunday, May 5, 2013
give thanks
Bob and I had our second adoption training class yesterday, on the drive there I was telling him how I had read in Mark that morning about Jesus feeding the 4000. In each of the gospels, we hear this story, and each time he does this, he take the loaves and fish, they start with giving thanks. Giving thanks for what Jesus is about to do, what they know he can do, and what he will do, if they just bring him the loaves and fish.
In the midst of this adoption, I get caught up in what we need, very easily. We need to read this book, take that class, gather that paperwork, have this much money ready, and can easily lose sight of this journey, and how thankful I am for it. Nor do I want anyone to think this has been a picture perfect box of an adoption, or our family is the smiling, calm picture above. We yell, we fight, we get impatient, and wonder what we're getting into, often. But know that if we continue, the blessings now and then far outweigh the rough road now.
It's been a tough road, and I'm thankful for it. We are and will be a stronger family, have a stronger marriage, and get to experience one of the greatest joys in life, another child in our family. This journey has produced amazing conversations along the way with people that are becoming close friends. Whether they've been in touched by adoption or are learning about it through us, we've felt supported in the exciting times, as well as the tough times. Along the road of exploring what is best for our family during this process, we've made and are making some decisions that will further our walk, our life, and our children's lives indefinitely, and that excites me. I am thankful for the women we've come in contact with through our adoption home study agency, they have been encouraging, supportive, and extremely informative. We could easily look at an all day Saturday class as boring, the 6 hours each time have passed quickly and left us more aware and informed of how we are going to parent this kiddo. We know we'll fail at that too, and we're thankful, because we'll grow and be challenged and know that we are moving forward.
Right now I'd love to seek your prayers in this journey for where our next step would be. While our initial plan is a little boy from Uganda, we are making sure to seek out and understand how domestic adoption would fit our family as well. We know whatever choice we come to, he'll pave the way, and we'll give thanks.
In the midst of this adoption, I get caught up in what we need, very easily. We need to read this book, take that class, gather that paperwork, have this much money ready, and can easily lose sight of this journey, and how thankful I am for it. Nor do I want anyone to think this has been a picture perfect box of an adoption, or our family is the smiling, calm picture above. We yell, we fight, we get impatient, and wonder what we're getting into, often. But know that if we continue, the blessings now and then far outweigh the rough road now.
It's been a tough road, and I'm thankful for it. We are and will be a stronger family, have a stronger marriage, and get to experience one of the greatest joys in life, another child in our family. This journey has produced amazing conversations along the way with people that are becoming close friends. Whether they've been in touched by adoption or are learning about it through us, we've felt supported in the exciting times, as well as the tough times. Along the road of exploring what is best for our family during this process, we've made and are making some decisions that will further our walk, our life, and our children's lives indefinitely, and that excites me. I am thankful for the women we've come in contact with through our adoption home study agency, they have been encouraging, supportive, and extremely informative. We could easily look at an all day Saturday class as boring, the 6 hours each time have passed quickly and left us more aware and informed of how we are going to parent this kiddo. We know we'll fail at that too, and we're thankful, because we'll grow and be challenged and know that we are moving forward.
Right now I'd love to seek your prayers in this journey for where our next step would be. While our initial plan is a little boy from Uganda, we are making sure to seek out and understand how domestic adoption would fit our family as well. We know whatever choice we come to, he'll pave the way, and we'll give thanks.
Saturday, May 4, 2013
Rawr!
My dear friend Emelie, made these, as a donation for our adoption. And you benefit! These two are for sale for a minimum donation of $50 for one. No need to live near us, I'll mail them to you!
Each bracelet also has a little sterling silver charm that reads "Rawr!", if you've ever talked to Emelie, shes probably rawr-ed at you a few times! I met Emelie one morning a little over a year ago, teaching her the sport I love. Luckily she has fallen for the sport too and we've become fast friends in the process. She has blessed me in more ways than I can count!
All stones are natural semi-precious stones, the wire and findings are sterling silver. Please let me know if you'd like the Tigers Eye or Green Agate. There are just two so grab them quickly. You're support means the world to us!
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Race Letter!
A few people have asked what would be the best approach in fundraising for a race, here's a letter to copy and paste, and fill in, to send to your family, friends, co-workers, church, etc.
_________________________________________________________________________________
Dear ______________,
As you know, I'll be racing (insert your race and date of the race here) this summer. I've decided to do it to race support for the Hansel Family's Adoption. You can read more about their journey here: www.hanseladoption.blogspot.com. Their story has touched me because _____________________. (Tell them about your race, why you race, your goals for the race.)
If you feel led to donate, I'm asking for a $____ per mile I race, which will bring them one step closer to bringing their little guy home.
Thank you for your support!
_________________________________________________________________________________
It means the world to us that you would take time to do this in honor of our adoption. We don't take it lightly. And would love to know what race you plan on doing to raise money for our adoption so we can be your biggest fans. Believe me, we'll be cheering the loudest.
_________________________________________________________________________________
Dear ______________,
As you know, I'll be racing (insert your race and date of the race here) this summer. I've decided to do it to race support for the Hansel Family's Adoption. You can read more about their journey here: www.hanseladoption.blogspot.com. Their story has touched me because _____________________. (Tell them about your race, why you race, your goals for the race.)
If you feel led to donate, I'm asking for a $____ per mile I race, which will bring them one step closer to bringing their little guy home.
Thank you for your support!
_________________________________________________________________________________
It means the world to us that you would take time to do this in honor of our adoption. We don't take it lightly. And would love to know what race you plan on doing to raise money for our adoption so we can be your biggest fans. Believe me, we'll be cheering the loudest.
Thursday, April 25, 2013
we can do hard things
There is nothing we love more than our children. Jett, Maggie, and Faye have taught us to love challenges.
I thrive on feeling uncomfortable. I strive for workouts daily that exhaust me and leave me feeling every muscle for hours after. I'm also beginning to understand and appreciate recovery as a tool for getting stronger, where there is rest there is growth.
When you translate that to family life, Bob and I know that hard work, loving our kids well, staying up with a sick kiddo or to work, stretching ourselves for the needs of each other, constantly, does too, need it's rest time. We know what God calls us to do, and is calling us to do, is stripping us of our selfishness and our pride. And it's hurt, still will for awhile, or in another season with other challenges. But this kind of hurt is good. After all, he promises to bend, and not break us. He hasn't given us more than we can handle, though some times it's felt like it! I'd like to say our "on hold" time could be wrapped up in a nice little box and left there, but the truth is, it's been messy, and scarey, and exhausting, and well worth the place we are now. The lesson? We won't deny the mess of it, but be grateful He makes that mess beautiful.
We would love your continued prayerful support of our family, as we get back on this journey of adoption. And in the following ways if you feel led:
Our next class is May 4th, any takers for three fun kiddos for the day while we are in Fort Collins?
We'll be doing an online "31" bag party with details on my Facebook page.
Let's get the garage sale back and rolling!!!
When: Sunday, June 2, 2013
Donations appreciated up until Thursday, May 30
Are you doing a race this summer? Please contact me if you'd be interested in raising funds from your friends and family for ours!
I thrive on feeling uncomfortable. I strive for workouts daily that exhaust me and leave me feeling every muscle for hours after. I'm also beginning to understand and appreciate recovery as a tool for getting stronger, where there is rest there is growth.
When you translate that to family life, Bob and I know that hard work, loving our kids well, staying up with a sick kiddo or to work, stretching ourselves for the needs of each other, constantly, does too, need it's rest time. We know what God calls us to do, and is calling us to do, is stripping us of our selfishness and our pride. And it's hurt, still will for awhile, or in another season with other challenges. But this kind of hurt is good. After all, he promises to bend, and not break us. He hasn't given us more than we can handle, though some times it's felt like it! I'd like to say our "on hold" time could be wrapped up in a nice little box and left there, but the truth is, it's been messy, and scarey, and exhausting, and well worth the place we are now. The lesson? We won't deny the mess of it, but be grateful He makes that mess beautiful.
We would love your continued prayerful support of our family, as we get back on this journey of adoption. And in the following ways if you feel led:
Our next class is May 4th, any takers for three fun kiddos for the day while we are in Fort Collins?
We'll be doing an online "31" bag party with details on my Facebook page.
Let's get the garage sale back and rolling!!!
When: Sunday, June 2, 2013
Donations appreciated up until Thursday, May 30
Are you doing a race this summer? Please contact me if you'd be interested in raising funds from your friends and family for ours!
Friday, March 29, 2013
on hold
The rawness of this post has haunted me. I haven't known what to write, but I desperately want to. To live an authentic life we must be real, loved, worn, and genuine.
Bob and I have decided to put our adoption on hold and spend some time and energy directed toward our family now. We ask that you take your curiosity and direct it toward prayer for the path we are currently on.
The money you've so graciously given has gone to the adoption, and if you choose to give more in the upcoming months through races or the like, it will remain in our adoption fund. If, in the heartbreaking event, that we decide to not continue with this adoption, we will give it to another family pursuing their adoption and trust that Gods plan is greater than our own, we only walk in obedience where he leads.
Bob and I have decided to put our adoption on hold and spend some time and energy directed toward our family now. We ask that you take your curiosity and direct it toward prayer for the path we are currently on.
The money you've so graciously given has gone to the adoption, and if you choose to give more in the upcoming months through races or the like, it will remain in our adoption fund. If, in the heartbreaking event, that we decide to not continue with this adoption, we will give it to another family pursuing their adoption and trust that Gods plan is greater than our own, we only walk in obedience where he leads.
"We've learned so much, Siddhartha. There still remains much to learn. We are not going in circles, we are going upwards. The path is a spiral; we have already climbed many steps."
Friday, February 22, 2013
GARAGE SALE
WE DON'T WANT YOUR JUNK :)
Date: Saturday, April 13
Drop off dates: now - April 11
We will be holding a garage sale to raise funds for our adoption on Saturday, April 13 starting at 7am.
Bring your gentle used donated items for us to sell (things you would buy yourself), we'll organize and price them and add to our jar!
If you want to volunteer to man the garage sale the day of, or come help price and organize the day before, we would sincerely appreciate it!
Also, are you a baker? Would you want to have a table with goodies to sell that morning as well?
Let's make this day great!
Date: Saturday, April 13
Drop off dates: now - April 11
We will be holding a garage sale to raise funds for our adoption on Saturday, April 13 starting at 7am.
Bring your gentle used donated items for us to sell (things you would buy yourself), we'll organize and price them and add to our jar!
If you want to volunteer to man the garage sale the day of, or come help price and organize the day before, we would sincerely appreciate it!
Also, are you a baker? Would you want to have a table with goodies to sell that morning as well?
Let's make this day great!
Monday, February 18, 2013
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Jett's prayer last night
I felt this one last night, it hit me. And its one I pray most days, all day. I love this boy.
Dear Jesus,
Thank you for a warm house and good food and great friends. Please help us not to get any sicker and stay healthy because its flu season. Thank you for Mom, Dad, Faye, and...................Maggie. Please take care of our new baby until we can get him. In Jesus name, Amen.
Can you imagine how that sounded in heaven?
Dear Jesus,
Thank you for a warm house and good food and great friends. Please help us not to get any sicker and stay healthy because its flu season. Thank you for Mom, Dad, Faye, and...................Maggie. Please take care of our new baby until we can get him. In Jesus name, Amen.
Can you imagine how that sounded in heaven?
Friday, February 8, 2013
here comes the... boom?
I wish I had a fun or clever way to present this... catchy phrases or one liners that looped you in and made you laugh out loud, but instead, I give you this:
OUR HOME STUDY PORTION OF THE ADOPTION IS PAID FOR.
In case your a numbers person, that's $5000.
That's a lot of friends, and friends of friends, and acquaintances, and complete strangers that have said they want to be a part of this and see our little guy be a Hansel.
That overwhelms me. We offer nothing more than willing hearts. We will do and go where God calls us. We will do anything. And God can do anything. So there ya go, you can cry, I did today, quite a few times.
"God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us." Ephesians 3:20-21
What's the next step?
Now we finish the write up portion with our social worker and start to submit them, and 4 dozen other sheets of signed and notarized paperwork, to our placement agency. Then, we write grants, and pray for favor. And while we do all that, we hope that you'll continue to spread the story of our journey, to get this little guy home, debt free. We hope and pray that you'll enter a race and ask your friends to sponsor you, buy a bracelet, a barnwood frame, or think of some insanely creative way to support us through this. Most of all, we covet your prayers, to run this race with endurance, to wisely move forward, and to love and care for the family we are now, while helping us dream of the one we will become.
OUR HOME STUDY PORTION OF THE ADOPTION IS PAID FOR.
In case your a numbers person, that's $5000.
That's a lot of friends, and friends of friends, and acquaintances, and complete strangers that have said they want to be a part of this and see our little guy be a Hansel.
That overwhelms me. We offer nothing more than willing hearts. We will do and go where God calls us. We will do anything. And God can do anything. So there ya go, you can cry, I did today, quite a few times.
"God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us." Ephesians 3:20-21
What's the next step?
Now we finish the write up portion with our social worker and start to submit them, and 4 dozen other sheets of signed and notarized paperwork, to our placement agency. Then, we write grants, and pray for favor. And while we do all that, we hope that you'll continue to spread the story of our journey, to get this little guy home, debt free. We hope and pray that you'll enter a race and ask your friends to sponsor you, buy a bracelet, a barnwood frame, or think of some insanely creative way to support us through this. Most of all, we covet your prayers, to run this race with endurance, to wisely move forward, and to love and care for the family we are now, while helping us dream of the one we will become.
Tuesday, February 5, 2013
well checks, kind of...
When I called to ask the doctor to write our letter, stating that these goofy three were free of communicable diseases and were healthy kiddos (a letter needed for the home study), they said they needed to see Jett and Faye. Odd that having not seen them wouldn't prove they were healthy :)
But, to follow the doctors orders, in we went. Everyone's healthy (Ms cough warranted a mask in the office). Faye needed a shot, Jett asked to leave the room for it, we got our letter, and celebrated with ice cream!
But, to follow the doctors orders, in we went. Everyone's healthy (Ms cough warranted a mask in the office). Faye needed a shot, Jett asked to leave the room for it, we got our letter, and celebrated with ice cream!
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
loaves and fish
It is quite humbling to ask for money. It is not something I take lightly. With every dollar handed to us to support this adoption, I am blessed beyond measure.
When we started this, I knew God was going to have to take our meeger means and grow them greatly. It would be no small feat to get to the amount of money needed to bring this little guy home, however, I have no doubt that He can do it. And I'm willing to do anything, just as I would for the three tucked in their beds (ok our bed) under our roof currently.
We are not in this for anything but to serve our mighty God. He has placed theses desires of our hearts to have a larger family, loud and fun, that seeks after Him. What greater gift to give our children than to expose them to this world? To give them a greater loving capacity for His heart. And the blessing in return? To watch this child grow and become a part of our family, and change us for the better.
We need $750 more to finish paying for the home study portion of our adoption. Then comes the grant writing portion. After the home study, we will need another $10-$15,000 more. That number seems in fathomable. But to Him who is able to do infinitely more than we ever dreamed or imagined be the glory.
Thank you, from the depths of my soul for your support in this journey. Your prayers and words of encouragement bless us daily.
Here are some ways to currently support us, if you have other ideas, please share!
- buy a bracelet ($10) and spread the word, the more people we reach the better
- order a custom frame, 8x10s are $50
- drop off your kid or dog, we'll gladly love on them
- order coffee
- get sponsored for a race
- sponsor someone racing (I can connect you with a fabulous friend who is seeking sponsorships)
- spare change, drop it in a jar and share it with us
Email me if you have questions! erinmhansel@hotmail.com
When we started this, I knew God was going to have to take our meeger means and grow them greatly. It would be no small feat to get to the amount of money needed to bring this little guy home, however, I have no doubt that He can do it. And I'm willing to do anything, just as I would for the three tucked in their beds (ok our bed) under our roof currently.
We are not in this for anything but to serve our mighty God. He has placed theses desires of our hearts to have a larger family, loud and fun, that seeks after Him. What greater gift to give our children than to expose them to this world? To give them a greater loving capacity for His heart. And the blessing in return? To watch this child grow and become a part of our family, and change us for the better.
We need $750 more to finish paying for the home study portion of our adoption. Then comes the grant writing portion. After the home study, we will need another $10-$15,000 more. That number seems in fathomable. But to Him who is able to do infinitely more than we ever dreamed or imagined be the glory.
Thank you, from the depths of my soul for your support in this journey. Your prayers and words of encouragement bless us daily.
Here are some ways to currently support us, if you have other ideas, please share!
- buy a bracelet ($10) and spread the word, the more people we reach the better
- order a custom frame, 8x10s are $50
- drop off your kid or dog, we'll gladly love on them
- order coffee
- get sponsored for a race
- sponsor someone racing (I can connect you with a fabulous friend who is seeking sponsorships)
- spare change, drop it in a jar and share it with us
Email me if you have questions! erinmhansel@hotmail.com
Monday, January 28, 2013
in it
I met a mom of 5 this weekend, two biological children, and three adopted. I love the connection you make instantly.
Her best words of encouragement, love the family you have now.
Be content. The right kiddo will be placed in your family at the right time, because the right funding was in place and we were living in the right house, and ... the list goes on.
We are doing a good job with the paperwork it takes to make this happen, methodically going through the steps. I like check lists and task lists, and lists in general, so it makes sense to me.
I do however, relate it to stages in life. I love the ages my three are now. Its fun and challenging and exciting and exhausting. I'd like to pause time. But I also know I loved the stages they were at a few months ago, and the stages they'll be at a few months, years, and decades from now. Because they're them. And all the excitement and challenges and love that will grow from adding this new life to our family.
Whole heartedly living now, whole heartedly longing for whats to come.
Her best words of encouragement, love the family you have now.
Be content. The right kiddo will be placed in your family at the right time, because the right funding was in place and we were living in the right house, and ... the list goes on.
We are doing a good job with the paperwork it takes to make this happen, methodically going through the steps. I like check lists and task lists, and lists in general, so it makes sense to me.
I do however, relate it to stages in life. I love the ages my three are now. Its fun and challenging and exciting and exhausting. I'd like to pause time. But I also know I loved the stages they were at a few months ago, and the stages they'll be at a few months, years, and decades from now. Because they're them. And all the excitement and challenges and love that will grow from adding this new life to our family.
Whole heartedly living now, whole heartedly longing for whats to come.
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
The Connected Child
Everyone I talk to and everything I read point to this book in adoption. I'm excited to read it!
Saturday, January 19, 2013
let your faith be bigger than your fear
There are days, that I doubt everything. It's not an easy road. A big part of adoption, is having your life be an open book, to be judged as to whether or not you will be a suitable family for the little boy you dream about.
This week I had a psychological evaluation done. After a brief conversation with the psychologist, I sat down for a 567 true or false questionnaire. Supposedly, this would determine any diagnoses. Luckily, I passed - no diagnosis :) Bob's is in two weeks.
On Monday, we will have our first home visit of four. She'll spend time with us, interview us, tour our home, etc. While we have nothing to hide and have three fantastic kiddos, it can still be a little nerve racking.
I've had some really hard conversations with some of you (if you even read this blog), questioning our decision. All of these questions I ask myself a thousand times over in my head, daily. Will our marriage stand up to the trials of another child? Will we crumble financially? Can we handle the process? What special needs will he have? Is this really what you want God? We don't own our house, we have two older cars, very little savings, and work really hard for one of us to be with the kids, which leaves little room for comforts.
My biggest fear? The money. It has such potential to direct the length of time this process will take. God keeps reminding me that he is bigger than this, but there are days I fail to trust him with it. In my darkest moments, I'm reminded, with a check in the mail or an alert on my phone from someone has seen our story or believes in what we're doing, and I'm reminded he's got this. We have a warm house, a never-give up marriage, a bedroom for him to share with a very excited brother, TWO cars, a savings account, and one of us gets to be with our kids. He can do this. My faith is not in the process, the money, whether you believe we should do this or the judgement of a social worker that walks through our home. My faith is in the One that is leading us through all these things to bring us to this little boy, as we seek after His heart.
This week I had a psychological evaluation done. After a brief conversation with the psychologist, I sat down for a 567 true or false questionnaire. Supposedly, this would determine any diagnoses. Luckily, I passed - no diagnosis :) Bob's is in two weeks.
On Monday, we will have our first home visit of four. She'll spend time with us, interview us, tour our home, etc. While we have nothing to hide and have three fantastic kiddos, it can still be a little nerve racking.
I've had some really hard conversations with some of you (if you even read this blog), questioning our decision. All of these questions I ask myself a thousand times over in my head, daily. Will our marriage stand up to the trials of another child? Will we crumble financially? Can we handle the process? What special needs will he have? Is this really what you want God? We don't own our house, we have two older cars, very little savings, and work really hard for one of us to be with the kids, which leaves little room for comforts.
My biggest fear? The money. It has such potential to direct the length of time this process will take. God keeps reminding me that he is bigger than this, but there are days I fail to trust him with it. In my darkest moments, I'm reminded, with a check in the mail or an alert on my phone from someone has seen our story or believes in what we're doing, and I'm reminded he's got this. We have a warm house, a never-give up marriage, a bedroom for him to share with a very excited brother, TWO cars, a savings account, and one of us gets to be with our kids. He can do this. My faith is not in the process, the money, whether you believe we should do this or the judgement of a social worker that walks through our home. My faith is in the One that is leading us through all these things to bring us to this little boy, as we seek after His heart.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Sunday, January 13, 2013
training #1
Bob and I drove to Ft. Collins yesterday, not knowing what was in store for a 9am-4pm training on adoption. This was training #1, there will be three. One in February and one in March. I'm looking forward to them both. On the drive home, Bob said it was worth missing the Bronco's in the playoffs. I love my husband.
It was heavy information, but valuable. It should be a must for all parents before they even have biological children. The premise was "don't be scared, become prepared". Knowledge is power right? We learned so much yesterday, about special needs kiddos, neglect, abuse, and trauma, self-assessments, attachment, and all the resources available. How the brain reacts, the durability of these kids, and the way their lives can change when they come home is amazing.
We feel like we're "in" it now, it feels real. Our first home visit (there will be four) is next Monday. We met our social worker yesterday and like her as well. Good thing, she'll be doing our post placement visits, once this guy is home too.
To complete the home study, we'll need another $1200. There are many ways to help:
- race the GO St. Louis half with this team
- pick any race and ask for sponsors
- buy a $10 HANSEL ADOPTION TEAM bracelet
- buy a barnwood, walnut, or beetle kill frame
- let us babysit for you
- donate something we can sell (declutter people, it feels great!)
Have any other great ideas that we haven't thought of? Email me please!
We are so grateful for all of you, we are so grateful for this unbelievable journey.
It was heavy information, but valuable. It should be a must for all parents before they even have biological children. The premise was "don't be scared, become prepared". Knowledge is power right? We learned so much yesterday, about special needs kiddos, neglect, abuse, and trauma, self-assessments, attachment, and all the resources available. How the brain reacts, the durability of these kids, and the way their lives can change when they come home is amazing.
We feel like we're "in" it now, it feels real. Our first home visit (there will be four) is next Monday. We met our social worker yesterday and like her as well. Good thing, she'll be doing our post placement visits, once this guy is home too.
To complete the home study, we'll need another $1200. There are many ways to help:
- race the GO St. Louis half with this team
- pick any race and ask for sponsors
- buy a $10 HANSEL ADOPTION TEAM bracelet
- buy a barnwood, walnut, or beetle kill frame
- let us babysit for you
- donate something we can sell (declutter people, it feels great!)
Have any other great ideas that we haven't thought of? Email me please!
We are so grateful for all of you, we are so grateful for this unbelievable journey.
Saturday, January 12, 2013
How's the adoption going?
It's a common, every day question. It's going :) Today, I shower at home. It's a little weird, to be out the door and not dressed like I'm going to a gym where I'll run, bike, or swim and then shower. Bob and I head to Ft. Collins today for an all day class. I'm excited about our first class, a requirement of the home study. I get giddy when I drop yet another piece of mail in the mailbox to request a certified copy of something. We'll also be scheduling all of our visits today with our social worker, who will write our home study. While I'm not a patient person by nature, I do understand the process of this. The kids are starting to too. They know our guy doesn't come home tomorrow. Last night, laying in bed with Maggie, I was explaining where we were going today. She asked if other people, who wanted to bring home a baby, would be there too. She gets it, as much as her sweet almost 5 year old mind can. I wonder how to prepare their hearts. I wonder if I even have to. We have amazing kids, and they'll be amazing siblings, just like they already are. Willing to love and comfort one another, and one more.
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